If you want it, here it is...

...come and get it...

I love that Badfinger song - which was written by Sir Paul McCartney, by the way.

Basically, that song popped in my head because it seems to accurately reflect my attitude over the past week or so.  If you want something bad enough, go get it...  That truly is the mantra that I will be following going forward.  I've done it to an extent, but over the past week I have taken a harder look at myself and saw ways to be more consistent with this.  I have also seen people recklessly throwing opportunities away because they sell themselves short or are just too fucking lazy to deal with things in a way that would get them EVERYTHING they wanted.  Or both, actually.  One sort of perpetuates the other.

I don't want to be that person.  I HAVE been that person in the past and I don't want to be that person again.  I have too much pride in myself to sell myself short or settle for less than what I want, and therefore I am really pushing myself and my abilities.

Example:  as I had written yesterday, I set a new PR for running a mile.  I run more than a mile, but I like to see what my fastest mile can be and work to improve my average mile.  For a long time, I was stuck around 9:21 or so.  Yesterday, 9:19!  I was happy!  I made it known that my next goal was going to be breaking 9 minutes.

Today, I RAN AN 8:36 MILE!  I couldn't believe it!  I took all this anger and frustration I have felt over the past couple of weeks and really started channeling it into my fitness.  It is obviously paying off.  I pushed myself real hard, and yes, it hurt a bit that last tenth of a mile, but I don't care.  I felt GREAT after seeing my time.

Another example:  Yesterday, I played a gig for the first time in YEARS.  16 years to be exact.  It wasn't MY gig - a friend had an acoustic gig at a vineyard on the North Fork of Long Island - and I asked if I could sit in for some songs.  I basically sat in for about 2 sets worth of songs, playing mostly stuff I have NEVER played before...ever...I think of the 20 or so songs I played with him I played 18 for the first time - no practice, not even knowing the chords.  Talk about trial by fire!

It was the most fun I have had in a while, and I miss that feeling.  I need that feeling of excitement and childlike joy back in my life.  It's been gone for too long even though it's only been a few weeks.

No one is going to provide this for me on their own, though.  I have to go out and get it.  I know what I want.  I know where it is.  I just need to get it.

"Did I hear you say that there must be a catch?"

Yep, there most certainly is a catch...but that's only because I am allowing there to be one.  I need to either change my perspective on this subject or shift focus completely to another subject.  In either case, the 'catch' needs to go.  There should be nothing weighing down happiness.  There shouldn't be restraints on what or who inspires you daily, what or who drives you to be a better person.  It should be invited, welcomed, and embraced.  However, if you wait too long to make that decision...well, as the song says:

"You better hurry 'cause its going fast!"

Nothing waits forever...grab it while you can.  Live in the now and make it your future.

Peace y'all...

 - M